I don't know much more about Chrissy Teigen than she's funny and cooks and is very active on the Twitter. And I think I met her husband once. I do know that she's had infertility problems. The fact that I know this means Chrissy Teigen is willing to talk about her infertility which, even on a base level of acknowledgement, is a pretty huge thing to do as a celebrity. Scratch that, talking about your infertility woes is big for anybody. She just has a platform with which to do it. So her issues, her losses, her challenges are magnified compared to the rest of us.
Infertility on its own can be an isolating and often shameful experience. Basically, your body - for whatever reason - doesn't work right. That's awful. If your body not working right resulted in a stroke or a limp or a tumor there would be no reason to feel shame. People would understand even if they don't really understand or share the same affliction. But for some reason, when it comes to making a baby, shame enters the picture. I don't know if it is how we view women's bodies (though male factor infertility is nearly as common as female factor) or that sex and sexuality is involved that it makes people uncomfortable to talk about and ultimately keeps them quiet from shame.
Something about infertility keeps people quiet. I am guilty of that. For me, it was easier to make an entire movie about infertility than it was to discuss its frustrations and challenges with friends and family. Movies are really, really hard to make! And yet talking about being sad that you and your partner are having trouble conceiving is even more difficult. Now that that movie is nearly complete, the goal really is to create a dialogue for a medical problem that people are so sensitive and afraid to discuss. So when I was reading the Twitter today and I saw the uproar about Chrissy Teigen having the guts to talk about her infertility, and openly discuss her decisions and hopeful success with IVF, it reminded me both how courageous and vile people can be around the same topic. The difficult decisions around alternative reproductive treatments and technology are often lost on the outside world. Also, dear lord some people are assholes to somebody they've never met before.
See now you got me all serious and genuine. Let's get back to smiling and grinding out the end of this film. Be nice to each other. Be open to the difficulties those in the infertility community have, not just in their losses and grief but in the difficult decisions they must make along the way. And don't reply on every single Twitter feed you come across. That's it. Sorry. I'm done. #hashtag #indiefilm #infertility #youknowsomebodygoingthroughit #leaveChrissyalone
Love,
Noah